HAVE you talked about money?
Money is one of the top items to argue about in a relationship. Everyone has their unique attitude towards money, to which family history and past experiences have a huge influence on. Before being able to really talk about money, you need to dig up your own attitudes. What were the common beliefs about money at your childhood home? Is money root of all evil or perhaps a great tool for having power, fun, or safety? Did your family struggle financially, were you comfortable or really wealthy? Was money neutral or was it used for showing affection or used as means of power? Did money stress your parents?
Different money types
According to Ken Honda, author of Happy Money: The Japanese Art of Making Peace with Your Money (Gallery Books, 2019), there are 8 different money types: the saver, the spender, the moneymaker, the indifferent, the hippie/monk, the saver-splurger, the gambler, and the worrier. Which type are you? Are you similar types or opposites? Can you understand your partner why they are the type they are? Can you accept each other’s types? How will you want to handle your money?
THE saver
The Saver’s favorite thing to do is to save money. Having lots of money in the bank makes the Saver feel safe and secure. The Saver considers to be an expert on bargain shopping and in a case of receiving extra money would probably put it in their savings account.
Strength of the Saver is to create a sense of security, weakness is a tendency to hide from life and pull back.
The Spender
The Spender’s favorite thing with money is to spend it, they love giving gifts for no reason. By spending money there is a feeling of being in control of it. The Spender’s motto might be “you only live once”, in a case of receiving extra money, the spender would probably spend all of it.
Strength of the Spender is living in comfort with allowing life and energy to flow, a good trust in life. Weakness would be the tendency to live out of balance, unable to stop spending and being exhausted by it.
THE MONEYMAKER
The Moneymaker’s favorite thing to do is improve their ability to make more money. Earning money feels great and they often choose to work rather than spending time with family and friends.
Strength of the Moneymaker is the ability to create and innovate, be productive and make things happen. Weakness is the tendency to live out of balance when loosing sight of other parts in life like health and relationships. Everything else than making money becomes secondary.
THE INDIFFERENT
The Indifferent rarely thinks about money, they would be happy to leave all the money thinking to their partner or accountant. Money prices are of no interest, money does not cause any stress.
Strength of the Indifferent is trust in life, like an innate knowing that life will work out, focus on other aspects of life. Weakness on the other hand is that their lack of attention to finances can cause practical difficulties in their life if no one else is taking care of those aspects.
THE HIPPIE/MONK
The Hippie/monk thinks that money is basically bad wishing that the world would focus less on money and more on important things. If the Hippie/monk would find money on the street, they would likely give it to charity or at least spend it on necessities. They would like to live their life affected by money as little as possible.
Strength of the Hippie/monk is the capacity to focus on larger purpose in the world and being of service to others. A weakness could be a disconnection from life and money which means not having the resources to create what they want for themselves or the world.
The Saver-splurger
The Saver-splurger saves for a long time and then spends it all, always swinging between saving and spending. This leads to purchases which they might regret later on.
Strength is being able to vary their behavior, being flexible in a sense. Weakness is that when spending unconsciously they often feel guilty or ashamed of where their money went.
The Gambler
The Gambler is living for excitement and thrills taking often big risks with money for possible big rewards. Considers people who live a regimented life really boring.
Strength of the Gambler is to take healthy risks and create new possibilities. Whereas, the weakness is that when they are risking compulsively for the thrill of the hunt, they can lose all their resources.
the worrier
The Worrier is always worried about money no matter how much they have. They tend to believe that there is trouble coming in the future and need to be prepared for the worst. They are fearful a lot of the time and wish they could be more confident about money and life in general.
Strength of the Worrier is the ability to see the problems people may have before they happen. Weakness of the Worrier is that they can see everything as a problem, which leads to becoming paralyzed and afraid of taking any action.